The past couple of days have been hectic and humbling. I haven’t been swamped at work with patients (although I did have a shortened day today due to a meeting and ended up seeing 12 kids in the morning alone) but I have been a bit swamped with the back office stuff of running a practice. I spent all evening last night posting insurance remittances, figuring out how to send out patient statements and this was all done after 4th grade curriculum night at Quarton.
Declan’s teacher for 4th grade is the same one he had for 2nd grade and she knows and loves him. It was humbling to see how much influence and support and guidance he gets from her and the other adults at school. I had always recognized that ‘it takes a village to raise a child’ as the saying goes and never has that been more evident than with Declan. His teachers know him in ways I never will and love him for all he is. It is wonderful to share him with such loving people.
Today was humbling as well but in a different way. After a wonderful morning at work seeing 12 patients and a spectacular afternoon, I went to curriculum night at Derby knowing I would probably run into a good friend who I have neglected terribly over the past few months and I was actually nervous about seeing her. This is a pattern in my life. I have close friends who I really care about and am at times very close to and then life gets busy or I get a little overwhelmed by the ‘responsibility’ that friendship brings and I withdraw. It is not a healthy or appropriate pattern and then once I pull back, I begin to feel guilty and embarrassed about my behavior and rather than just tell the person how I feel and reconnect, I pull away even more. STUPID! Lucky for me, Liz is such a good friend that she has learned (the hard way) that my distance is NEVER about her but about me. About my life and my own quirky pathology. She waits patiently for my sheepish return and lucky for me embraces me again.
I have lots of theories about why this pattern persists of closeness, then distance, then guilt and embarrassment about the distance, then sheepish return but regardless of why it happens, I am lucky that I have good friends like Liz who accept me even with my huge shortcomings. Apparently it takes a village to raise me too!
Shop at Anthropologie, eat mexican food, and reconnect with good friends and each day will be your best!
Molly O’Shea, MD Birmingham Pediatrics + Wellness Center